6 ∅ [Video]

[callbacks]

[There's a bright little bird...lizard thing minding its own business on a branch, cleaning its feathers and looking around with puzzled curiosity. The owner of the PokéGear sets it standing in the fork of the tree and then starts to creep up the branch with hands and knees, trying to keep his breath quiet. He's a kid, small, small enough for the branch to hold his weight, but it dips and the Archen notices him. As one, they freeze, and then both leap at once, the Archen away and the boy towards it, in a crush of squawking and leaves and confusion.

The PokéGear falls, too, thudding to the grass amid the cries of Pokémon, and it's hard to tell what's happened for a minute until a Gallade comes to pick it up. He's balancing a four-year-old blond boy on his hip while a Togetic hovers in dismay, everyone dusty from the fall, but the kid squirms in the Gallade's hold and beams without smiling from behind his very familiar shades. Proud and apparently unhurt, Dave holds up a PokéBall towards the 'Gear.]

I caughted it.

[Wart the Gallade turns the camera to his own desperate, exasperated, bewildered face.]

Help me.

((Kiddo Dave replies will come from knightoftimeout!))

Comments

[knightoftimeout]

[Well, it makes him feel fuckin' small, to tell you the truth, but before he can get worked up and bothered about it John's down on his level and the move is unexpected enough to surprise him, to get him off balance. Charmed, he actually thinks about the question.

After a moment, he inclines his head.]

Will you 'tenlike being a pony. Or, or a rocket ship.

[harlequinhater]

[It takes John a moment to parse what Dave's saying, just because it's been a while since he's had to deal with little kids. It takes an entirely different skillset than parsing Dave's usual roundabout way of saying things.]

Uh, okay, you want me to be a rocketship? I guess I can do that.

[It would have been so much cooler if he could still fly... but also probably a lot more dangerous.]

You've gotta make the rocketship noises, though. Deal?

[knightoftimeout]

[In response, Dave just scampers around to John's back and puts little hands on his shoulders.]

Up?

[Ready or not, John, he's clambering aboard.]

[harlequinhater]

[John is in fact so ready for this piggy back ride, and as soon as Dave feels secure, he steadies his friend's stubby legs and stands up.]

Okay, tiny Dave. Hold on tight!

[John starts walking in the direction of the hotel, though he starts off slow, just to make sure that Dave isn't going to tumble off of him by accident.]

[knightoftimeout]

Hehehe!

[This is much more like it. John needn't worry, Dave's grip is good and solid. Maybe he was born secretly part marsupial, what the fuck did John put in his genes when he made him.]

Brrrrroom, baroom, pwwoooooh... [This is his attempt at rocket ship starting noises, but he pauses and tries to look down at his best friend.] John, rocket ships goes faster than this, dude.

[harlequinhater]

Hey, this is just the rocket ship starting phase! It needs to get warmed up first. But don't worry, little Dave, we're ready for blast off in three... two... one...

[Then he starts running off with reckless abandon, going nearly as fast as he can.

It's probably a good thing he can't fly anymore.]

[knightoftimeout]

YEEEEHEHEHE!

[THIS IS THE BEST MOMENT OF YOUNG DAVE'S LIFE. He clings to John, grinning and laughing before he masters himself to provide the requisite rocket ship noises.]

Pchooooooooooooooooooooooo!

[harlequinhater]

[John is laughing like a madman, and he starts to run in squiggly lines and zig zags, just to make his duration as a rocketship even more exciting. He might be getting off track from the hotel, though. Just a bit.

John isn't a god anymore, though, and all of this running around is enough to wind him. He slows down after a few good minutes, trying to catch his breath. Though he isn't going to let his best bro down by ending the his pretend space adventures there.]

Aw man, I think the rocketship's running out of fuel. We might have to go in for a crash landing!

[knightoftimeout]

[This is a LOT more fun than getting thrown off a roof! Dave's legs bounce a little at the new wrench thrown into their plot, but he's happy to play along.]

Oh shit, son. [That? Sounds hilarious coming out of a four-year-old's mouth, by the way.] We gotta--we gotta use a parrychute. Afore it explooooodes!

[He raises both little fists into the air for a moment of drama, but gloms back on quickly enough. Kid knows how not to fall, at least.]

[harlequinhater]

Mini Dave, I told you! No swearing!

[John doesn't really push Dave on that point, though. It's right back to the crash landing as he slowly falls to his knees.]

Quick, you got to get the parachute! The ship is going to self destruct! Weee-wooo, weee-wooo, weee-wooo.

[John continues to make alarm sounds as he slowly sinks closer and closer to the ground. Dave had better be ready to evacuate!]

[knightoftimeout]

[Gassssp, oh no!]

Tell--tell my wifes and kids that I love them! I'll never forget you, Rocket John!

[Acting quickly, Dave unzips his little hoodie, grabs the zipper, and then leaps from John's back with what is honestly some fairly impressive air for a little kid, hoodie held above his head as a parachute.

He slips when he lands and falls on his butt, but doesn't even grunt. He just turns and looks at John expectantly, then lifts his hands again.]

Bwoooooooh.

[(That's an explosion noise.)]

[harlequinhater]

[John has to bite back a grin as he finally falls to the ground on his back, shaking his hands a little bit for dramatic effect when Dave provides the very important explosion noise.

When the explosion finally "settles," he sets his hand over his heart, closes his eyes, and sticks his tongue out with a final dramatic gagging sound. Here lies Rocket John, who died as he lived: being a big fucking goober.]

[knightoftimeout]

[Dave regards the tableau with solemn dignity for a moment, then gets up and drapes his hoodie ceremoniously over John's face.

R.I.P. in pieces, dude. We knew ye well.]