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oh man uh
ok let me start with the easy stuff first
1 yes stuff his face with cookies that solutions karkat tested and strider approved
2 karkats actually one of the nicest people i ever met you just gotta get past that prickly pear exterior to reach the soft soulful jellybean filling underneath
which mostly isnt even actually that hard
he likes helping people just bring him problems that arent his own and watch him go
anyway as for your actual question
like
mmmghghhgh i forget how much do you know about the other sessions
ok let me start with the easy stuff first
1 yes stuff his face with cookies that solutions karkat tested and strider approved
2 karkats actually one of the nicest people i ever met you just gotta get past that prickly pear exterior to reach the soft soulful jellybean filling underneath
which mostly isnt even actually that hard
he likes helping people just bring him problems that arent his own and watch him go
anyway as for your actual question
like
mmmghghhgh i forget how much do you know about the other sessions
Okay, baked goods as peace offerings is a plan. Got it.
And that is a rambly description of what I said, so I agree.
But I'd rather not pile problems onto him, that sounds rude.
As for other sessions, I...
I don't know?
Roxy told me we defeated the Condesce, but I don't know how far ahead that is.
I had literally just woken up after dying to become a God Tier before I found myself in "Mom"'s house.
And that is a rambly description of what I said, so I agree.
But I'd rather not pile problems onto him, that sounds rude.
As for other sessions, I...
I don't know?
Roxy told me we defeated the Condesce, but I don't know how far ahead that is.
I had literally just woken up after dying to become a God Tier before I found myself in "Mom"'s house.
right which was before i wouldve met you
shit well
i cant go into too much detail because i wasnt there and its not my story to tell but the trolls session was a clusterfuck of mathematically unreal proportions
and
karkat lost a lot of friends
and blames himself for a lot of shit
what sorts of topics have been setting him off
shit well
i cant go into too much detail because i wasnt there and its not my story to tell but the trolls session was a clusterfuck of mathematically unreal proportions
and
karkat lost a lot of friends
and blames himself for a lot of shit
what sorts of topics have been setting him off
Um. Actually, he sort of said as much to me when I casually dropped some information from my session.
About dead friends, I mean.
And I...didn't exactly know that the dead trolls being thrown into our kernelsprites by the living version of the purple ghostly monstrosity following him around a couple months ago were his friends.
Or that said purple monstrosity was a...troll-thingie of his in the past.
I wouldn't have said anything if I'd known!
About dead friends, I mean.
And I...didn't exactly know that the dead trolls being thrown into our kernelsprites by the living version of the purple ghostly monstrosity following him around a couple months ago were his friends.
Or that said purple monstrosity was a...troll-thingie of his in the past.
I wouldn't have said anything if I'd known!
ohhhh shit
gamzee came up??
fuck
ok yeah that dude is verboten in karkats conversational world and if i had my way in all physical worlds too
gamzee related topics to avoid:
clowns
faygo
religious assholehery
things that go honk in the night
ooh yeah on that note be careful with pranks too dudes skittish as fuck about some things
gamzee came up??
fuck
ok yeah that dude is verboten in karkats conversational world and if i had my way in all physical worlds too
gamzee related topics to avoid:
clowns
faygo
religious assholehery
things that go honk in the night
ooh yeah on that note be careful with pranks too dudes skittish as fuck about some things
Um, yeah, that guy came up.
I'm not exactly his biggest fan either, but if I'd known it was that bad I would have purged him from all future conversations already.
At the very least, I don't have a particular liking for any of those things, though I can tolerate clowns.
Huh.
Okay, good to know.
I think he also doesn't like buckets or something? He was less than enthusiastic about them when we were all at the beach.
So...I'm going to avoid buckets in conversation and in any benign prank attempts.
I'm not exactly his biggest fan either, but if I'd known it was that bad I would have purged him from all future conversations already.
At the very least, I don't have a particular liking for any of those things, though I can tolerate clowns.
Huh.
Okay, good to know.
I think he also doesn't like buckets or something? He was less than enthusiastic about them when we were all at the beach.
So...I'm going to avoid buckets in conversation and in any benign prank attempts.
so when a troll of any sex loves another troll of any sex very much or also hates them real good in a nonplatonic manner
they shack up in one of the concupissant quadrants which is apparently trolls snooty term for the sexy quadrants
and after they concupisce they mutually dump the resulting fluids into a big old handy bucket that every trolls got to have on hand
and then these red hulking robots come around and pick up the buckets as tribute to the old lady grub
in whose belly the sex juice goes to mix with all the other horny trolls contributions in a gross orgiastic slurry
and when thats all sat around long enough she pops out hundreds of colorful wiggly fuckers that grow up into the upstanding grey gentlemen and ladies we cohabitate meteors with today
so when karkat sees a bucket hes not thinking "OH A CONVENIENT CYLINDRICAL IMPLEMENT FOR CARRYING SOAP AND WATER FROM FLOOR TO FLOOR FOR MY TROLL CINDERELLA COSPLAY"
hes thinking "WHY DID SOMEONE JUST LAUNCH A SEX TOY THROUGH A GLOWING GREEN DOG PORTAL INTO MY FACE????"
and thats why sometimes he gets a lil uppity about our human promiscuity all leaving cleaning supplies lying around and shit
they shack up in one of the concupissant quadrants which is apparently trolls snooty term for the sexy quadrants
and after they concupisce they mutually dump the resulting fluids into a big old handy bucket that every trolls got to have on hand
and then these red hulking robots come around and pick up the buckets as tribute to the old lady grub
in whose belly the sex juice goes to mix with all the other horny trolls contributions in a gross orgiastic slurry
and when thats all sat around long enough she pops out hundreds of colorful wiggly fuckers that grow up into the upstanding grey gentlemen and ladies we cohabitate meteors with today
so when karkat sees a bucket hes not thinking "OH A CONVENIENT CYLINDRICAL IMPLEMENT FOR CARRYING SOAP AND WATER FROM FLOOR TO FLOOR FOR MY TROLL CINDERELLA COSPLAY"
hes thinking "WHY DID SOMEONE JUST LAUNCH A SEX TOY THROUGH A GLOWING GREEN DOG PORTAL INTO MY FACE????"
and thats why sometimes he gets a lil uppity about our human promiscuity all leaving cleaning supplies lying around and shit
haha ok
your wish is my command
also this isnt really a topic to avoid per se but like
hell never admit this but hes really bummed about being the only troll here with the world all tooled to human sensibilities
im still struggling myself with how to make him comfy with that if its even possible so just know that thats a thing
your wish is my command
also this isnt really a topic to avoid per se but like
hell never admit this but hes really bummed about being the only troll here with the world all tooled to human sensibilities
im still struggling myself with how to make him comfy with that if its even possible so just know that thats a thing
Oh! Huh.
I think I can understand that.
I mean, there are most definitely perspectives on things that he has that don't translate well if he brings them up to us. And he's literally in an entirely new body here, right? I do remember trolls do not look like us.
Why don't you both try dressing up as trolls sometime? Just for the heck of it. Unless that isn't going to help...
I think I can understand that.
I mean, there are most definitely perspectives on things that he has that don't translate well if he brings them up to us. And he's literally in an entirely new body here, right? I do remember trolls do not look like us.
Why don't you both try dressing up as trolls sometime? Just for the heck of it. Unless that isn't going to help...
WHAT ARE WE GOING TO TELL TEREZI??
Edited (hOW DID I FORGET TO PICK AN ICON) 2016-11-21 11:02 (UTC)
karkat
she probably somehow already knows
she smelled it off the falling new barkian leaves
i dunno man what do you want to tell her because i guarantee you anything but the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth is somehow just going to be even more revealing
she probably somehow already knows
she smelled it off the falling new barkian leaves
i dunno man what do you want to tell her because i guarantee you anything but the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth is somehow just going to be even more revealing
OK FIRST, FUCK YOU FOR IMPLYING THAT I WAS PLANNING ON KEEPING THIS FROM HER
I MEAN I'M NOT EXACTLY THRILLED BY THE PROSPECT OF TELLING MY FORMER FLUSHCRUSH THAT I'M IN SOME HEINOUS CLUSTERFUCK OF A DUAL (????) QUADRANT WITH TWO HUMANS, ONE OF WHOM IS HER EX-MATESPRIT
TO SAY NOTHING OF HOW MUCH SHIT SHE'S GOING TO GIVE ME OVER THIS AFTER SHE
I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T KNOW HOW SHE'S GOING TO REACT, THAT'S THE POINT!! ALL I KNOW IS SHE'S EVENTUALLY GOING TO FIND IT FUCKING HILARIOUS AND, I DON'T KNOW, GOD, AT LEAST IT'S TEREZI AND NOT, SAY, ERIDAN. OR SOME OTHER TROLL WHO WOULD COMPLETELY MISUNDERSTAND
ASSUMING SHE DOESN'T MISUNDERSTAND?? DAVE TELL ME YOU THINK SHE'LL UNDERSTAND.
I MEAN I'M NOT EXACTLY THRILLED BY THE PROSPECT OF TELLING MY FORMER FLUSHCRUSH THAT I'M IN SOME HEINOUS CLUSTERFUCK OF A DUAL (????) QUADRANT WITH TWO HUMANS, ONE OF WHOM IS HER EX-MATESPRIT
TO SAY NOTHING OF HOW MUCH SHIT SHE'S GOING TO GIVE ME OVER THIS AFTER SHE
I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T KNOW HOW SHE'S GOING TO REACT, THAT'S THE POINT!! ALL I KNOW IS SHE'S EVENTUALLY GOING TO FIND IT FUCKING HILARIOUS AND, I DON'T KNOW, GOD, AT LEAST IT'S TEREZI AND NOT, SAY, ERIDAN. OR SOME OTHER TROLL WHO WOULD COMPLETELY MISUNDERSTAND
ASSUMING SHE DOESN'T MISUNDERSTAND?? DAVE TELL ME YOU THINK SHE'LL UNDERSTAND.
dude
shell understand
and shes going to rib you relentlessly for at least a perigee
but also i bet shes gonna be fuckin thrilled and ask if she can be your human maid of honor and if human maids of honor can dress as dragons
and if not why cant she at least threaten to eat the dude reading our vows if he gets them wrong
sure maybe itll be kind of weird given our previous contentiousness re her but she and i split triassic ages ago and also come on
you think shes gonna pass up a chance to get her digs in at either of us by not shooting the shit with you about the date knight experience
(get it)
(cuz were knights)
shell understand
and shes going to rib you relentlessly for at least a perigee
but also i bet shes gonna be fuckin thrilled and ask if she can be your human maid of honor and if human maids of honor can dress as dragons
and if not why cant she at least threaten to eat the dude reading our vows if he gets them wrong
sure maybe itll be kind of weird given our previous contentiousness re her but she and i split triassic ages ago and also come on
you think shes gonna pass up a chance to get her digs in at either of us by not shooting the shit with you about the date knight experience
(get it)
(cuz were knights)
[okay sorry give him a minute, he's seen enough romcoms by now to know what a human maid of honor is and]
[... Human marrying Dave and Jade wouldn't be that bad, actually. Oh, god, Jade must never know.]
IF KANAYA EVER GETS HERE
OR I GUESS *WHEN* KANAYA GETS HERE BECAUSE AT THIS RATE SHE HAD FUCKING BETTER
TEREZI CAN BRING UP THE WHOLE DRESSING LIKE A DRAGON THING WITH HER BECAUSE
OR I GUESS *WHEN* KANAYA GETS HERE BECAUSE AT THIS RATE SHE HAD FUCKING BETTER
TEREZI CAN BRING UP THE WHOLE DRESSING LIKE A DRAGON THING WITH HER BECAUSE
[wait no FUCK SHIT ABORT]
THAT ISN'T THE FUCKING POINT, DAVE!!
THE POINT IS THAT IT'S GOING TO BE WEIRD NO MATTER HOW I TELL HER AND HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL HER, DAVE.
YOU'RE BANNED FROM THIS CONVERSATION WHEN IT HAPPENS, BY THE WAY. OR
FUCK MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE THERE? SINCE YOU WERE WITH HER LAST AND MAYBE IT'LL BE LESS WEIRD THAT WAY.
SHOULD I ASK JADE ABOUT THIS TOO? BECAUSE IF BOTH OF US ARE GOING TO BE THERE THEN SHE SHOULD BE TOO. RIGHT??
THAT ISN'T THE FUCKING POINT, DAVE!!
THE POINT IS THAT IT'S GOING TO BE WEIRD NO MATTER HOW I TELL HER AND HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL HER, DAVE.
YOU'RE BANNED FROM THIS CONVERSATION WHEN IT HAPPENS, BY THE WAY. OR
FUCK MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE THERE? SINCE YOU WERE WITH HER LAST AND MAYBE IT'LL BE LESS WEIRD THAT WAY.
SHOULD I ASK JADE ABOUT THIS TOO? BECAUSE IF BOTH OF US ARE GOING TO BE THERE THEN SHE SHOULD BE TOO. RIGHT??
jesus christ karkat
have you considered just like casually
when we pick her up i mean
mentioning oh hey tz by the way its been about a year since we last saw one another and now this intrepid trios sitting cozy three to a two seater
its snug but it works and tbh were adorable
and shell be like
1 BL3SS TH1S UN1ON BY L1CK1NG 4LL OF YOU COP1OUSLY!
and then she and jade will start roleplaying forest creatures and youll have freaked out for nothing as usual
have you considered just like casually
when we pick her up i mean
mentioning oh hey tz by the way its been about a year since we last saw one another and now this intrepid trios sitting cozy three to a two seater
its snug but it works and tbh were adorable
and shell be like
1 BL3SS TH1S UN1ON BY L1CK1NG 4LL OF YOU COP1OUSLY!
and then she and jade will start roleplaying forest creatures and youll have freaked out for nothing as usual
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